The birds are back
Photo cred wildaboutbirds.com
Living in urban areas is all about the give and take of sharing space with others. But it was not until I moved into my current apartment that I had to learn to share space with a different kind of neighbor.
For there is a family of birds who live on my porch (seasonally).
They are house sparrows (or porch sparrows as I like to call them) and though I am pretty sure they do not migrate south; they must go to a warmer porch for the winter.
Full disclosure, I am pretty into birds these days. And I love to sit on my porch, watch them and identify their various songs with this app.
But sharing my porch with a family of birds is a different story.
Sometimes they are loud, dirty and downright obnoxious. And they are most certainly not contributing financially. But other times they are cute, their songs are pretty and watching them makes me feel like I am part of something.
Not being able to communicate with your porch neighbors, though, does pose a challenge. Every time the front door opens - they fly away. Every time I bring my tea to sit on the porch - they fly away. And every time I go to tend to my flowers - they fly away.
Even after years of doing this, we still have not figured out a healthy way to communicate. And, though, I have never been particularly great at languages - I wish I could just learn some basic sparrow and chirp out that I come in peace.
Luckily they do not understand windows so I can stand and watch them perch, chirp and tend to their nest- and they can't see me.. So when I heard those chirps the other day, I smiled.
The birds are back.
(The rest of my porch may be infested by chipmunks - but that is a story for another day)
Human neighbors can also be difficult to communicate with.
Sometimes you hear too much. Like your upstairs neighbor jumping on their trampoline above your head or your next door neighbor blasting smooth jazz on a warm summer day.
Coexistence with others can be riddled with misunderstandings, annoyances and conflict.
But other times those very same neighbors are there to take care of your cat, help you dig out your car during a snowstorm or save you when you are in need of an emergency cup of sugar.
Winter here in Upstate NY was brutal and we have all been through a lot since New Years. Like you I am finding this time in the world quite difficult and it feels hard to be inspired.
But where I have found hope is in the way people, all over the world, have been showing up for their neighbors.
This has made me see my own neighborhood in a different way. And it has made me wonder how good of a neighbor I really am. I wonder if I am brave enough to show up for my neighbors as others are. It has also made me see the opportunity of living in community as a daily practice in connecting over differences (if I so chose to engage). And it has clarified how these connections make a very real difference in my life.
Just a few weeks ago there was a knock on my door and I opened it to find two (human) strangers on my porch.
Turns out they live around the corner and had been on a walk when they noticed a car with a flat tire. They were knocking on people’s doors on my street with hopes they could find the owner and help them change their tire (this explained the tools they were holding). I was pretty sure it was my neighbor’s car, so I sent them next door.
This simple exchange gave my faith in humanity a much needed boost.
I am sure all of you have stories of neighbors showing up for you in good times and in bad. Or when you have made a small gesture to help a neighbor or a stranger.
Each little thing we do reminds people that we are more than the terrible news.
Living in close proximity to anyone (including my feathered porch neighbors) comes with its own complexity, but in a time of widespread isolation, loneliness and division - it is most certainly better than the alternative.
If you are interested in learning more about how people are showing up for their neighbors and communities check out the Weave: The Social Fabric Project at the Aspen Institute.
It was started by New York Times Columnist David Brooks in 2018 and the project supports local “Weavers” all over the country.
Check out their Social Trust Map to learn about examples of projects all over the country and to see how your own community is doing.
Thank you to everyone who sent me opportunities and people to connect with. I very much appreciate it! There is still some uncertainty on my end, but there are some interesting potential things percolating.
A few offerings to consider:
Board Retreat: Hire me to plan and facilitate a half-day or full-day board retreat (Because I know you do not have the time to do it).
Strategy Session: Or schedule a 60 min session with me to trouble-shoot and plan out your own workshop, meeting or board retreat.
New Workshop:Building a Community of Support which is around how we creatively resource ourselves and our organizations at this moment. And I am looking for a group to pilot it with.
Get in touch if you want to learn more!
One thing the winter did provide - time to practice making cappuccinos (see my previous newsletter). Check out the picture below. It is all about the milk frothing technique.
